I play Australian Rules Football. And by ‘play’ I mean I stand on the ground while genetically superior individuals tackle, punch and generally run rings around me.
However, one of the great joys of Australian Rules Football – and sport in general – is the inspirational pre-game / half time captain / coach speech. I am lucky enough to play in a team full of guys willing to have a tilt at revving everyone up. But it would be fair to say there aren’t any great orators among them.
Here are some of my favourites, from both my own team, and others I have heard about:
“Guys if you can get to training once a week, great. If you can get down once a fortnight, even better.”
“Run yourselves into the ground boys. We’ve got seven good legs on the bench.”
“If we win each quarter, we’re a chance to win the game.”
[Having never played the team before]: “We owe these *****.”
[At quarter time]: “Don’t switch off. We’ve still got a half of footy to play. ”
If anyone has heard any others, let me know. I’m sure I’m not the only guy snickering at the back of the huddle.