Pierce Brosnan + L’Oreal = worst ad EVER

Witness, if you will, the worst ****ing advertisement ever, constantly played without remorse on Australian television:

This isn’t quite the version shown in Australia. We have been blessed with a longer, wankier version (yes, it is possible). Pierce Brosnan is at best a mediocre actor, but has followed in the footsteps of Ken Sutcliffe and built an entire career out of having a set of dreamy blue peepers.

Seriously Pierce, how could any individual be so serious about themselves? I bet you talk about yourself in the third person, and probably prefixed with ‘the’ (i.e. “The Pierce specifically asked for a full length mirror – where is it? The Pierce does not approve”)

Why don’t you try this on for an alternative script?*

There’s more to life than making movies.

Appearing in montages…
Being a knob…
Sucking in my stomach…
Looking wistful…

I’m not washed up…I’m worth it. Really I am. Really.

Please L’Oreal, I promise to buy your stupid product, just take Pierce’s whispering voice off Australian television…please!

*Mental note: learn how to grab Youtube videos and dub them.

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4 thoughts on “Pierce Brosnan + L’Oreal = worst ad EVER

  1. Chrissie Jones says:

    Someone tell me why Pierce’s ad is any worse than all the other L’Oreal ads that have females saying they’re worth it? Or indeed Ewan McGregor in whatever male fragrance he advertises. Men are so jealous of Pierce. He does not take himself seriously at all if you’d ever read anything about him and he is far from being a mediocre actor. He’s a brilliant one! And a great human being. A loyal husband, a wonderful father and a commited environmentalist.
    There’s more to writing blogs than being a twat.

    • monkeybizness says:

      Chrissie, just re-writing the script of the ad in the comments section does not prove anything about The Pierce.

      Look, I know googling your middle-aged fantasy every night is not how you imagined your life would turn out, but here you are. So it must come as a shock to discover the world doesn’t share your glowing opinion of a man who rides horses while wearing white linen.

      Truth is, The Pierce is average. And if you want me to provide evidence of a mediocre acting career, I present you with Mamma Mia, Dante’s Peak, Mars Attacks….aah, screw it, here’s a link to his entire CV: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000112/

  2. EM says:

    Insult The Prime Minister…nothing. Insult The Pierce and you get called a twat. Isn’t the internet a wonderful place to connect with the world.

  3. Era says:

    Before reading the first comment I was going to ask if you had seen Mama Mia. That movie alone confirms your point. Who in their right mind thought Pierce could sing? And after the first few weeks of filming, you’d think that a voice over would be recommended.

    When I was a girl, Pierce was dreamy in Remmington Steele. I also enjoyed his work in Mrs. Doubtfire. But other than that, I was glad when he retired as 007. He also made some movie with Selma Hayak and Woody Harrelson (After the Sunset) and it was AWEFUL. Thomas Crown Affair was alright.

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